Bush Tales of Australia – You can’t get the smell of Dingo pee out of a swag.

At night, its a primal, haunting sound that echoes in the silence. The mournful howl of a distant dingo.

Asleep in our swag, I snuggle just a little bit closer to Kevin. I feel a sense of unease, a genetic trait in my DNA passed on from my long ago ancestors. After all, a dingo is a wild dog distantly related to wolves. Attacks on humans are rare but it has happened. Like any wild animal a dingo can be unpredictable.

Kevin and I have been lucky enough to sight a few dingoes during the day while we are travelling the Outback. They are naturally shy and cautious around people so you don’t encounter them often. We hear them at night all the time but they are wary and stay away from our camp.

Its common to hear dingoes howling at night when you are camped in the Outback of Australia. Sitting by a blazing campfire, its a lovely sound that adds to the sense of remoteness. Its kind of eerie. Not at all threatening when you have the fire for protection. Once again, just like our early ancestors once did. We are genetically programmed to love camp fires.

Well, most of the time.

There’s always that one time though and it happened to Kevin.

The chance of Kevin having a wild dingo encounter was quite high considering his occupation at the time. He was a tour guide/driver on extended camping safaris for Australian Pacific Tours (APT). He drove a 4WD Mercedes 911 which was an adventurous looking rig.

Kevins APT 911. Remote 4WD adventure touring in Australia.

His job was to drive and keep his adventure seeking passengers enthralled with the Outback experience and scenery. He made them traditional gum leaf tea in a billy over the open fire while his camp cook was a whizz at cooking gourmet meals in the camp oven.

He would get the 911 bogged and make the passengers push it out. They loved it. Thought they were having the ultimate Aussie adventure. He got lots of tips.

While his passengers spent the night in canvas tents, Kevin slept in his beloved canvas swag. A swag is a canvas zipped bag with a mattress inside. It rolls out straight on the ground and is toasty warm inside.

On the night of his dingo encounter, they were camped out at Palm Valley, near Alice Springs in Central Australia.

Central Australia has the most amazing night skies and he fell asleep on his back underneath the chandelier of stars. Later, something woke him. Not a noise, the passengers were all asleep. Just a sense of something not right.

He opened his eyes

The view of the stars was gone. Instead he was looking straight up a dingoes nostrils. A wild dingo was standing right above him with its jaw a mere inches above his head.

Imagine waking with this face just inches from yours

He froze. In his mind, he said to himself “DO NOT MOVE A MUSCLE”.

He couldn’t have moved even if he wanted too. He was paralysed by fear. One of those terrible nightmares where you need to run or scream but you can’t. It felt like an eternity but it was actually only a few seconds that it loitered above him.

The curious dingo then, with stealth, padded around his swag and paused at the foot end. It cocked its leg and took a piss on the end of Kevin’s swag. Then disappeared into the inky darkness of the night.

And Kevin finally took a breathe again………

Was it looking for a meal? Was it marking its turf? Would it have been truly hilarious if it pissed on his head instead of his feet? These are questions we must ponder……

Nose to nose with a wild dingo on a dark night. Now that’s a close call that very few of us will get to have. Thank goodness. His passengers got a lot of value out of the experience when the tale was retold in the morning. So much adventure in the Outback. They had the best tour ever.

You know what? Kevin never could get the smell of dingo piss out of his precious swag. It was a vile scent. Sadly, he was forced to chuck it and buy a new one.

That one had a hopping mouse adventure but that’s another tale………..